2 minutes

SO.  if you are at all an American with a TV radio or internet connection you get that shit is going down in our fair country as we speak.

If you have a loved one who was hurt in jeopardy or close I'm so sorry.  My daughter's teacher's daughter was running the marathon today but we know she's okay.  Not actually but. . . actually YEAH.

I've never loved God more today than I ever have in my life.

They say shit happens.  Yeah I know.  often.  daily

If you know me you know I married someone who owned my heart until he didn't.  And then I moved on.  With kids in tow.  To the great land of VA!  I freaking love DC area.  But for those who live in the land of the free and home of the brave we have luxury status as in a BUCKET LIST . . . . to run a marathon was one of mine.

I was even so arrogant as to put a "before 40" on that bitch.  Yeah.  I trained for the Richmond Marathon for almost 8 months.  it was 2011.  My secret goal beyond just finishing was under 4.  I ran that in 3:43.  I was under and uber pleased.  I qualified for BOSTON baby.  but.  Not 2013.  they changed it in my age group by two minutes.  or I would have been at that finish line with my family today.  two minutes.

I was the person who slept through their alarm on Sept. 11, 2001.

BUT I admit I was angry at first.  I ran - hard.  I walked through the water stops but god damn to qualify for my age I ran hard. . . . I'll admit I was a bit pissed off. then.  TODAY?

today.

I'm not pissed off

I'm grateful

okay I'm pissed off by the coward who took out runners.

I really would like him/her/coward group/whatever to suffer what they did to people

today.  I am sad.  I could have been there.  I was slated to be but my JESUS made me walk for two minutes.  He made me slow just a tiny bit.  I finished 17 minutes before I said but still in full street cred. He made sure I was a tiny rockstar but didn't go to Boston with my family 2013.

If you ever think a door is closing in front of you . . . it may be a door that a year and a half in front of you explodes on tv.  just say thank you Jesus and cry.  I know I did.  2 minutes.  I would have been there.  with my kids.