Don't even

So.

HEY

okay.  it's going to get uncomfortable.

I'm the girl who will say what she is thinking...  Because.  well, I'm educated. intelligent. and I can.

you are reading this so you either hate me and want ammo or like me and like what I have to say or are family and are both.

So.  Today was Wednesday.  or as Manassas knows it - 25% off at Salvation Army day.  aka Hispanic day.  I do so love everyone who lives in my country.  But again.  It is actually MY FUCKING country.  we do actually speak ENGLISH here.  Oh who am I kidding.  VIRGINIA?  or as it is so unaffectionately known "THE DMV"  as in the district of columbia, maryland, virginia.  ugh.

I am actually sad to live here.  It's so so so horrible to be white in Virginia.  It just is.

our jefe is black and that makes things so weird,  but since I didn't and would never vote for that asshole he's not actually my boss.  I still love all Americans.  black white brown. .  Jesus I love the whole bag of M&M's!!!

BUT Here's my question to all you readers.  . . . am I racist?  I love who I love and dislike people who are mean and stupid.  BUT I will be honest.  I went to a school in Winneconne Wisconsin of all white kids,  then a college of mostly WHITE kids.  The non-whites I knew were either great friends or friends of friends.   I didn't think of anyone I knew as a color just a friend,  Until Tim showed me how the blacks upnorth walked reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeallly slow across the road if your face was white when they walked in front of your car.

point of fact.  true. sad and sorry....

I was really just open to humans, lesbians, gays and racially mixed crazy folks.  didn't care if you were fun it didn't matter so I gotta believe I'm not.  but I know.  I don't necessarily like haters.

I side with Israel.  so I get that people hate that.  too bad,  really too bad

I love Israel

want to go for a long vacation.

love.

so any who.

shalom!

fan mail

oh my Lord Jesus I do wish.

So yeah I have a few followers but not all that many.  BUT that being said.  I'm still tossing this bone to anyone who wants to help this bitch out.  I need topics.

SO.  You toss a topic I will write it.  No matter how weird off the grid bizarre I'm game.  I actually live for this stuff.  You volley I WILL spike it back.  I guarantee.

TOnite was a gimme from the hubby sort...  Okay I was going to read but he felt guilty going to work so I said what if I wrote - would he feel as guilty and the obvious was no.  so here I am.  I'm just the genuine fixer that knows how humans typically work.

so the topic du noir is  . .   .  nostalgic movies.

Oh DEAR lord in heaven.   really?

Okay from the movies I SHOULD NOT HAVE SEEN to those I wish to GOD I had not. . . where do I start?

There are some really dumb things I love. and some dumb things I hate.  And then Moonstruck.

I know.

It's dumb.  I know it should not work.  On any level.  but.  I can quote it.  because it makes me laugh and then LAUGH really really loud.  and because I love Cher.  And Nicolas Cage.  and the grandpa with the epic eyebrows and dogs.  K

And then there is Rock n Roll HS.  Duh!!!

IT's the RAMONES.  If I have to it explain you would NOT get it.  IT's stupid on a pizza pie plate.  in spades.  BEYOND dumb.  REF ERR MADNESS only in the 80's.

TOday I watched Evil under The Sun.  Peter Ustinov in his fattest and most Belgian.   And Lady Chatterley's Lover.  Both bad.  and 80's but good in their remembering factor. and DH Lawrence and Agatha Christy have street cred.  Or at least Library shelf cred.

Mellor's. ugh.  yes please.  Bad Irish accent and all.  BUT I forgot how hot she was.  I'd do her over him any damn day.  And Lord Chatterley? - bad teeth and all.  sadly NO.  yuck.  complicated.  Yeah.  I get that.

There are so many movies I've been trying to find and weirdly last weekend I found Wings of Desire.  I finally got Roger to watch and it was me who wanted to cut it off because it was too hard to watch.  We soldiered on though and I'm glad he made me since it reminded me why I LOVE IT.

It's a movie in time and also out.  As a child who remembers her Grandparents speaking German more than English early on. . . it's a hard but easy thing.  Hearing German is hard since my grandparents swore at each other in that language.   German to me is the opposite of French.  French is female.  loving kind of caressing of the ear.  gentle.  German is male.  very hard phallic and course in it's sound. If you disagree . . . no you can't.  it's pretty basic. I don't dislike German.  It's my core.  BUT the sound of the language is hard.  Watch Monty Python.  Jesus.  The English get how hard German is.  it's just funny

So. . .  There are so many movies.

Nightmare on Elm Street.  yuck.

Clockwork Orange.  moving

Blade Runner. duh

Terminator and T2. yeah  I can do pull ups and push ups thanks to Catherine

All of the Merchant/Ivory movies.  I'm me.  thank you very fucking much

body heat?  meh

Romancing the Stone.  made me want to write and find out who the Dooby Brothers were.

and I fell in love with Michael Douglas

for five minutes

then I loved Johnny Depp

....

...

....

Daniel Craig could be a stop gap

Or Olivia Wilde.  Just saying



So.  I'm saying.  I'm a very very visual person but in a weird way. I FREAKING HATE the 3 stooges but LOVE the Marx brothers.  I LOVE Duck Soup.   That movie is from 1923!  Still watch  it often.


But well, There are so many things I won't watch.  I hate mean people being mean to each other.  I hate dumb for dumb sake. and sappy romantics.  NO Nicholas Sparks here.  I barely tolerated Twilight.  I could not even finish the stupid books.  But the movies finished it for me.  ok.

so.

topics love?   in order.  I will.  If you wanted to know what I think?  bring it.  I am in.

I coulda been a contenda ...........

so this has been an enlightening 10 week sabbatical.  I have learned a lot.  Like the fact that I like to work out.  a lot.  yeah.  I do.  It's kinda fun too.  sorry.  My triceps kill !!!  :D

I've also learned that this is a tough job market and if your resume isn't coated in f'n unicorn pee and glitter or dances on it's own or you don't have 4 phd's AND some special IT skill and speak fluent Mandarin and have a SPHR and a PMP with a minor in Engineering/Anthropology yeah, don't apply.

Oh yeah.  This is DC after all.  a VERITABLE GLOBAL market of people who are here,  but not really.  Super smart BUT from somewhere else.  I am smart but from America.  and white.  (Insert apology here)  If I was Hispanic/Indian/Black even with my same degree and background I would be unstoppable.  I know this.  but I'm a white chick.  I don't embellish my Resume.  Perhaps I should.   Maybe I'm suddenly from Dubai.  Not Manassas Park.  If I wore a burka would you hire me?  I am not bitter since I know who I am and know that I can create something from nothing really.  I started a sewing business in freaking ass poor Wisconsin that rocked.  I am currently living in the richest part of the US.  If I really really wanted to. .  okay game on.  BUT Do I really want to sew covers for couches in rich US of freaking A again?  not sure.  But I know I know what I know.  I can.  I'm good at it.  HELL i'm really amazing at it.  It's a skill I will never lose.  but it's not required today.  though I may send some feelers out.   I may do some marketing that will test the waters.

BUT.  there is one thing I know.  I do not want to sit for a living ever again.  I HATE sitting at a desk for 8 hours a day.  Honestly I would rather stand and check people out at a gas station than sit behind a computer and take hateful customers on the phone ever again.  UniF. wrecked my brain for a while.  I'm better.  I'd happily show someone where the toilet paper is or deck screws or freaking anything really.  I really do give good phone.  ask anyone.  But getting told I suck  - my people suck and anyone who knows me sucks because some lazy ass driver didn't deliver uniforms to his 2 man auto shop kinda killed my like of customer service.  It hurt my soul.  this 10 weeks has been a healing and awakening.  I remembered that I can do things.  I like things.  I'm, well, crafty.  and here's the cool part this time around.  I get to be.   There's no scorn, no derision.   I get to be crafty and like it.

(insert I'm sexy and I know it music)

I get to explore things and when I say explore - 90% of my exploration is epic fail.  I try things out and they don't work, so I rework and rework and scrap and try something else and they tell their friends and so on and so on and so on and well you get it.  I am an experimenter.  I got a ton of clothes from my UniF life that were going to go to a land fill.  SAD!!!  So I am cutting and trying to come up with something cool.  Maybe.  Or I give them away.  There are people who need clothes.  The landfill is pretty well full.  Nobody naked there.

So this is just the beginning.  I know that.  10 weeks is nothing.   I'm done apologizing.  I get to be me. Full fledged merit badge earned ME.  Frankly I would have to say it's about time right?  Stay posted cuz I have some cool ideas.  And I may need some of you. . . . :D