speechless

My kids come back to me tomorrow.  They have been gone 7 weeks.  It has been both a reprieve and struggle.  I am a creature of habit.  I'm an athlete.  I finally get to say that and not feel arrogant.  I did a marathon and did it fairly well.  I like to run.  it suits me.  I'm not running a marathon in 2 hours -  ever.  I know that.  frankly it would not be physically possible.  My legs are not 20 feet long!  and I'm not Ugandan or Kenyan.  little known fact.

My kids leave for the summer to spend time with their dad/stepmom and Wisconsin family - my world summarily shifts on it's axis.  I don't know what to do.  I both sigh in "LESS RESPONSIBILITY"  WHEEEEEEE!!!  and sigh in - SNAFU (situation Normal all "f"UP)

I miss them and relax and then feel a bit guilty for relaxing because what good mom doesn't want her children around her 24/7 and then I remember I AM a good MOM and feel guilty for feeling guilty since that's a Catholic thing and not a former Lutheran and decidedly not an Assembly of God thing . . . gah.

I got a bit of a lift last weekend seeing my sister Kristen and her husband Tom and my nephews Hayden and Ellis as they toured DC and we joined them last Saturday.  Hayden/Ellis  - who are hands down the coolest kids on the planet that didn't come out of my body . ..... . went to the Spy Museum - Hayden got a wallet with a badge inside it (the same one I told them was boring and that the boys thought was the most amazing place on earth - I suck :D )

We were walking down Constitution Ave (cuz yeah that's how we do it . . in the "DMV" (DC, Maryland and Virginia - yeah boyyyyy)

So down Constitution we were, on a scavenger hunt from the Marriott DC (cool hotel - stay there!) to the Lincoln.  It's a bit of a walk shall we say.  I forget what it's like to have little kids.  FORGET? LIKE A HOT FREAKING ROCK I FORGET!   I loved being pregnant.  I actually LOVED giving - oh yeah - GIVING BIRTH.  it was the next 4 years I could give the hell away.  I really really don't dig little kids.  beyond 5.  we good.  nursing.  necessary.  did it.  glad when over.  sorry when over really.  you never EVER recover.  least  I didn't.  sad little girls. :D  YEAH victoria secret.  shhhhhhh.

ANYWAY.  We had to stop like every block.  Now I'm used to whiners.  WHINERS!!!  WHINING on an epic HUGH GIGANTIC scale.  this was new.  Then again - when my kids were young we did FREAKING NOTHING!!!!!  A lunch was too much!  at home!  forget going out - VACATION?  are you on CRACK?  so I embrace that we walk slow and carry a tired child.  Roger even carried Ellis who I'm fairly certain didn't remember him.   But being Roger - got down and met him face to face and he has a kind face - and same goatee as dad -  must be a good guy right?  carried him a good half mile.

Let me also say it's hot - swamp Virginia/DC HOT!  we are sweaty and a bit cranky and I'm having shoe issues.

We are walking down C. Ave (yeah baby) and there are 2 mounted officers coming toward us. There are these Proud Officers on GORGEOUS horses - an absolutely amazing sight.  My nephew Hayden is in front of us.  He sees the officers. Hayden takes out his wallet WITH the badge.  Flashes badge and salutes them.  Saying silently, "I'm one of you - and I honor you fellow warriors!"  These men salute him back.  I know I teared up and an audible gasp escaped.  My sister did the same.

You can't make that up.

I got to hear some really great stories about my kids from my sister - things that made me laugh - cry and very proud.  Kids are amazing.  I can say with pride.  Being the mom to my kids is amazing and I love ever minute I get!  They make me who I am and make be proud to say they are mine!  Glad to have you back Babies!