I am sitting in my car going to work and the asshole dj I usually listen to driving into work (cough cough Elliot in the Morning) plays this song while someone on his crew is talking and I am thinking - ugh "I remember that song - it's um - it's um . .. Jesus I know this band. . . April Wine right? I used to know them from a hundred years back. . . " and decided - "hey - gonna download the mass of their songs . . . " and then BAM . . . .I am in the dark in seventh grade - kind of sweaty - at a dance - hoping Greg or Jeff will notice me in my Izod polo. Hoping my spikey sort of feathered hair is still BOTH spikey AND feathered. and that my Levi's are both tight and not so tight because I don't want to look fat and that my nike's are both cooooool and not so worn to look used. And then WOW......... I'm back in my car. Actually driving - as a grown up. As a grown up with kids who could be going to DANCES like what I remember. Ugh. It was fucking yesterday. Really. My turn is gone. Over - done - kaput - finished. I get that and I'm really not bitter. (really - okay a little) BUT I like me and like who I am today - - what I am saying is that a song can take me to that place in a heartbeat.
A person of religion once told me that he believed that Lucifer was in charge of music in the heavenly realm before he fell. I personally believe that. I know what music does to me. I know what music does to anyone I personally love. If music doesn't move you - chances are I don't love you. Because you don't get IT. I know what music can do to people. it's so so so so so so important. it just is. if you don't get music you really don't get life. IMHO and I know my sweet Barbara is with me.
Until you hear a band you haven't heard in literally 30 years - you won't believe me. I'm listening to my 7th grade self for the first time since. Today - Elliot played April Wine and I was like "omg I remember them!!!: instant download on iTunes (yeah today is slightly different) Holy Time WARP.
I woke up to Rainbow this morning so it was slated as slightly nostalgic to being with. but really. Sign of the Gypsy Queen? There was no hope of normal today.
Fortune cookie say - 3 things stay hidden not very long - the sun, the moon and the truth. yeah. Nostalgia is not really the truth - but it sure feels like it. Ugh Jeff - I loved you. Winneconne WI class of 1987. You were my crush. But of course it's "were". And I'm pretty sure Jeff and Chris and Alan are happily happy with the SO's. It's 2011 and I have wrinkles and drive a Volvo SUV. BUT dear Jesus I swear if I shut my eyes Tight. REALLY tight. I can feel my Gloria's and my short blond hair.
It's Trinity's turn to be awkward. and too WHATEVER. she is so awesome and I wish she knew it. I wish my mom thought I was wonderful back then. Well, Trin. I think you are amazing. If I do nothing more in this life than have great kids then I have done something worthy of my oxygen use. I just want people to get that life is so significant. All of it. The music - the art - the books - the whole ride - it's not just a daily grind. People live forever. and ever. It matters. All of it.
Love the one you're with. And live with the one you love. It's too short not to. It just is.
And energy drinks are dumb. just sayin.
No comments:
Post a Comment