Paradise lost.

did you ever have that (and I am really being serious - THAT friend?)  That innocent sweet friend you would tell or do anything with? That friend you had before you both really became you and before something came between the two of you forever. . . .  That friend was my Jodi.  Technically she was "88 and I was '87 but we were actually closer to the same age.  She could play piano and was tall and thin and super smart.  We sang at the top of our lungs to her piano playing - phil collins - cat's - anything we could sing together.  She was amazing.  She had only one sister.  younger.  My brother's class I think.  But her dad was a college instructor and I don't remember what her mom did exactly.  Be we were genuinely the original innocents.  We REALLY never did anything bad but got in trouble for what we didn't do.  It really was travesty but - now as a parent - I get it.  Jodi and I were drama queens.  legit.  We wanted to go to Great America (6 flags) with our driving boy friends. and I mean friends who were boys - NOT boyfriends.  Really really.  We had HUGE plans.  EPIC plans.  this was going to be the most fun day ever!!!

we made a list of things we were going to take.  Please know we used to get dressed up and serve each other dinner.  I'm not kidding - full dress - salad course - candles and we really were not gay!  (or were we? lol) understand that our dinner included grape juice (we called it Wine).  we wanted to be grown up as 9th-10th graders.

the list we made to take to Great America included that already said "wine." written in Jodi's tiny left handed script. But unfortunately for us - that list was intercepted by Jodi's mom.   She refused to believe we were not some how taking alcohol with us and we never got to go.

That truly broke my heart.  We were TRULY innocents.  We really did not understand how hard the world was.  Well, I did a bit, but it was somehow better when I was with her.  She made me forget how bad things were for a minute or two and for some reason I seemed to do the same for her.  We sunbathed topless in her backyard and didn't care.  Nobody was around there at that time.  It didn't even seem bad then and there.  We actually watched a deer decompose in the ditch down from her house over the weeks it takes as we used to walk together by it - daily.  We used to walk in the rain in our bikini's in the summer.  We called it our Epiphany walks.  Inseparable wasn't even the word.  she was my beyond friend.  She was my world.  And then came her Doug.

he wasn't good enough for her... really - he wasn't.  She didn't understand that.  SHE wanted him.

Then there was the string of Stephen's and then the Tim's  . . . .  for me.  I really didn't like any of them but it was too late.  We began to go different directions.  We barely hugged at my graduation.  and I never saw her again though my parents now live 1/2 mile from her parents house.  I guess she teaches math (of course she does something great!)  But it's so hard to think of the weirdness that ended us.  I guess the closer the relationship the harder it is to let go.  I still think of her often.  Jodi W.  I remember you with fondness.  And even if you never ever read this - there is a prayer for your happiness and wellness to the heavens sent by me.  you are someone I love forever.
I WOULD DIE 4 U!!!!!  and of course

IETBLBNNMF!  :D